On Vacation
I am away this week, so it seems a perfect time to write about my fellow real estate agents. But first, a disclaimer:
Uh Oh
The President of the Greenwich Association of Realtors, who usually spends his free time placing prank calls to my brother Gideon’s radio show (Wilcox&Fountain, WGCH, Fridays 1-3 p.m.) has put down his phone long enough to pen the following warning: “A number of members write articles about real estate for various publications. These articles are not endorsed in any way by the Association or the Greenwich MLS.” Those readers who thought they’ve been perusing the official house organ of the Association are encouraged to contact the board for a nice note of apology and a full refund of the subscription price of this paper. That out of the way, . . .
King of Hearts
Recently a deranged woman dressed in what appeared to be her pajamas overheard me speaking to a shopkeeper. “You’re a real estate agent?” she squawked. “So am I! In fact, I just sold a house last week without even leaving my bedroom!” I didn’t doubt her for an instant. Real estate is one of the few high paying professions (bond trading is another) that sets no barrier to entry. Anyone can get a license, no one has to show proof of even a nursery school diploma.
As a Jeffersonian, limited government kind of guy, I like this. We lawyers long ago got rid of apprenticeships and forced everyone to attend three years of law school. That kept the likes of another Abraham Lincoln from competing with us but I doubt it improved the profession. In real estate, however, one need merely attend a watered-down introductory course, pass a test even a blind ape could navigate and presto!—we’re unleashed on the world ready, like my colleague in her pajamas, to provide advice and counsel to anyone who asks. The question is, should you ask?
Well yes, you should. Not necessarily your next door neighbor (by law, every other Greenwich household must contain at least one licensed agent) but someone, and preferably someone who knows something about what they’re talking about. David Ogilvy once gave career advice to my brother when Gideon was just starting out in this profession: “learn everything there is to know about Greenwich real estate” he counseled, “and keep learning.” The best agents do exactly that.
A competent agent should know what is on the market. He should ideally have already seen every house that you are interested in. This is not always possible, but it’s interesting that one generally sees the same hundred agents or so travelling the bi-weekly open house circuit. That means 750 agents are sitting at home in their pajamas, wondering what’s for sale. While it can be a heart warming experience for you and your agent to share in a moment of mutual discovery, this is not the best possible use of your time.
An agent should know the past selling prices of houses on the street she’s showing, zoning codes, set back requirements (although it’s anyone’s guess what the current FAR regulations permit), construction methods, septic field design, the name of a good chimney sweep, etc. A large number of agents in this town do have this knowledge, and give good value for the commissions they earn. They return phone calls, they follow up, they attend to details. As for the rest? Like the one who years ago, after I’d rushed to complete a contract on a delicate deal, told me she was going shopping that afternoon and was too busy to deliver it to the buyer’s lawyer? (That woman is still in business, frighteningly enough). If, politically, you must select her or one of your next door neighbors as your agent, winnow the choice a bit by heeding the wisdom of General Baron Von Hammersteiner-Equord:
"I divide my officers into four classes; the clever, the lazy, the industrious, and the stupid. Each officer possesses at least two of these qualities. Those who are clever and industrious are fitted for the highest staff appointments. Use can be made of those who are stupid and lazy. The man who is clever and lazy however is for the very highest command; he has the temperament and nerves to deal with all situations. But whoever is stupid and industrious is a menace and must be removed immediately!"
Uh Oh
The President of the Greenwich Association of Realtors, who usually spends his free time placing prank calls to my brother Gideon’s radio show (Wilcox&Fountain, WGCH, Fridays 1-3 p.m.) has put down his phone long enough to pen the following warning: “A number of members write articles about real estate for various publications. These articles are not endorsed in any way by the Association or the Greenwich MLS.” Those readers who thought they’ve been perusing the official house organ of the Association are encouraged to contact the board for a nice note of apology and a full refund of the subscription price of this paper. That out of the way, . . .
King of Hearts
Recently a deranged woman dressed in what appeared to be her pajamas overheard me speaking to a shopkeeper. “You’re a real estate agent?” she squawked. “So am I! In fact, I just sold a house last week without even leaving my bedroom!” I didn’t doubt her for an instant. Real estate is one of the few high paying professions (bond trading is another) that sets no barrier to entry. Anyone can get a license, no one has to show proof of even a nursery school diploma.
As a Jeffersonian, limited government kind of guy, I like this. We lawyers long ago got rid of apprenticeships and forced everyone to attend three years of law school. That kept the likes of another Abraham Lincoln from competing with us but I doubt it improved the profession. In real estate, however, one need merely attend a watered-down introductory course, pass a test even a blind ape could navigate and presto!—we’re unleashed on the world ready, like my colleague in her pajamas, to provide advice and counsel to anyone who asks. The question is, should you ask?
Well yes, you should. Not necessarily your next door neighbor (by law, every other Greenwich household must contain at least one licensed agent) but someone, and preferably someone who knows something about what they’re talking about. David Ogilvy once gave career advice to my brother when Gideon was just starting out in this profession: “learn everything there is to know about Greenwich real estate” he counseled, “and keep learning.” The best agents do exactly that.
A competent agent should know what is on the market. He should ideally have already seen every house that you are interested in. This is not always possible, but it’s interesting that one generally sees the same hundred agents or so travelling the bi-weekly open house circuit. That means 750 agents are sitting at home in their pajamas, wondering what’s for sale. While it can be a heart warming experience for you and your agent to share in a moment of mutual discovery, this is not the best possible use of your time.
An agent should know the past selling prices of houses on the street she’s showing, zoning codes, set back requirements (although it’s anyone’s guess what the current FAR regulations permit), construction methods, septic field design, the name of a good chimney sweep, etc. A large number of agents in this town do have this knowledge, and give good value for the commissions they earn. They return phone calls, they follow up, they attend to details. As for the rest? Like the one who years ago, after I’d rushed to complete a contract on a delicate deal, told me she was going shopping that afternoon and was too busy to deliver it to the buyer’s lawyer? (That woman is still in business, frighteningly enough). If, politically, you must select her or one of your next door neighbors as your agent, winnow the choice a bit by heeding the wisdom of General Baron Von Hammersteiner-Equord:
"I divide my officers into four classes; the clever, the lazy, the industrious, and the stupid. Each officer possesses at least two of these qualities. Those who are clever and industrious are fitted for the highest staff appointments. Use can be made of those who are stupid and lazy. The man who is clever and lazy however is for the very highest command; he has the temperament and nerves to deal with all situations. But whoever is stupid and industrious is a menace and must be removed immediately!"
posted by Chris Fountain at 12:58 PM
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